The fruit of the Spirit includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, & self-control. Relationships that have these qualities align with God’s work.
The fruit of the Spirit includes love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, and self-control. Relationships that consistently produce these qualities align with God’s work. Teachings that produce shame, fear, or despair should be re-examined.
In Depth
Why Jesus & Paul Point Us Towards Outcomes
One of the most practical questions Christians can ask is not simply, “What does this teaching claim?” but, “What does this teaching produce?” The New Testament repeatedly encourages believers to look beyond appearances and examine the outcomes that emerge from beliefs, practices, and ways of living.
Jesus uses the image of a tree and its fruit to illustrate this principle. Healthy trees produce healthy fruit. Unhealthy trees produce something different. The point is not merely about external labels or stated intentions. It is about what becomes visible over time through a person’s life and actions. In a similar way, Paul points to the fruit of the Spirit as evidence of God’s transforming presence. Qualities such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control reveal something important about the direction a life is taking.
Both Jesus and Paul direct attention towards character and outcomes rather than relying solely on appearances, categories, or claims. What matters is not only what a person says they believe, but what those beliefs actually produce.
This perspective can be especially helpful when evaluating relationships. A relationship may appear acceptable according to social or religious expectations while causing significant harm beneath the surface. Abuse, neglect, manipulation, and control can exist even within relationships that receive widespread approval. External acceptance alone is not a reliable measure of health.
Conversely, a relationship that is questioned or dismissed by others may be producing qualities that scripture consistently celebrates. Compassion may be growing. Faithfulness may be deepening. Joy, patience, generosity, and spiritual maturity may be flourishing. Looking carefully at these outcomes can reveal realities that assumptions and labels sometimes obscure.
For many Christians, the principle of fruit provides a valuable lens through which to approach difficult questions. It encourages people to move beyond abstract debates and pay attention to what is actually happening in human lives. Are people becoming more loving? Are they growing in faithfulness and integrity? Is their relationship fostering care, responsibility, and spiritual growth? Are the fruits of the Spirit becoming more evident?
These questions do not provide instant answers to every theological debate, but they help ground the conversation in lived reality. The example of Jesus suggests that fruit matters. Paying attention to what beliefs and relationships produce can therefore be an important part of discerning whether they are moving people closer to the life, love, and flourishing that God desires.
What Is the Fruit of the Spirit?
In Galatians, Paul describes the qualities that emerge when people live in step with God’s Spirit. The list is familiar to many Christians: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. These characteristics are presented not as achievements to be earned but as signs of a life being shaped by God’s transforming presence.
What is particularly striking about this list is how deeply relational these qualities are. They are not abstract virtues that exist in isolation. Instead, they influence the way people interact with one another and the kind of communities they create.
Love fosters connection and concern for the wellbeing of others. Joy brings resilience and gratitude into relationships. Peace helps people navigate conflict without hostility or division. Patience allows relationships to endure through disappointment, misunderstanding, and difficult seasons. Kindness creates safety and trust. Goodness encourages integrity and care. Faithfulness strengthens commitment and reliability. Gentleness protects the dignity of others. Self control helps prevent selfish impulses from causing harm.
Taken together, these qualities paint a picture of the kind of character that reflects God’s work in a person’s life. Significantly, Paul does not focus here on social status, identity categories, or external labels. His attention is directed towards the qualities that become visible through the way people live and relate to one another.
For many Christians, this emphasis provides an important lens for evaluating relationships and spiritual maturity. The presence of God’s Spirit is recognised not primarily through belonging to a particular category but through the fruit that emerges in daily life. Character becomes the focus. The way people love, serve, forgive, support, and care for one another becomes a key indicator of spiritual growth.
This perspective has shaped many contemporary discussions about relationships. Rather than beginning with assumptions about identity alone, some Christians ask whether the fruits Paul describes are present. Are people growing in love? Is faithfulness evident? Are kindness, gentleness, patience, and self control being cultivated? These questions direct attention towards the qualities that Paul himself identifies as evidence of God’s presence and activity.
The fruit of the Spirit does not answer every theological question, but it does provide a powerful reminder of what spiritual maturity looks like. Throughout Galatians, Paul points believers towards character formed by love and expressed through relationships. In doing so, he offers a vision of faith that is centred not merely on categories or labels, but on lives transformed by the Spirit of God.
Healthy Relationships Produce Good Fruit
Anyone can claim that a relationship is loving. Words alone, however, do not always reveal the full reality of what is taking place. This is one reason the biblical idea of fruit can be so helpful. Rather than relying solely on labels or declarations, fruit invites people to look at what a relationship actually produces over time.
Healthy relationships tend to encourage growth in those involved. Compassion often deepens as people learn to understand one another more fully. Trust becomes stronger through shared experiences and consistent care. Difficult seasons create opportunities to practise patience, forgiveness, and perseverance. Support is offered not only when life is easy but also when circumstances become challenging.
As relationships mature, many people find themselves becoming more attentive to the needs of others. Grace can become easier to extend. Understanding often replaces quick judgement. Sacrifice becomes less about obligation and more about genuine care for another person’s wellbeing. These changes do not happen instantly, but they can become visible through the way people live and interact.
None of this suggests that healthy relationships are perfect. Every relationship encounters difficulties, misunderstandings, and moments of failure. Human beings remain imperfect, and even the strongest partnerships require ongoing effort, humility, and growth. The presence of challenges does not automatically indicate that a relationship is unhealthy.
What matters is the overall direction. When a relationship consistently encourages kindness, faithfulness, patience, generosity, responsibility, and mutual care, those outcomes deserve attention. Over time, the character of a relationship often becomes visible through the character it helps cultivate in the people within it.
This is why the language of fruit remains so powerful. Good fruit is rarely produced overnight. Growth tends to be gradual, sometimes almost unnoticed in the moment. Yet as months and years pass, patterns emerge. The qualities being nurtured become clearer, and the impact of a relationship can be seen in the lives of those involved.
For many Christians, this principle offers a practical way of evaluating relationships. Rather than focusing exclusively on categories or appearances, it encourages careful attention to what is actually being produced. The fruit may not answer every question, but it can reveal a great deal about whether a relationship is fostering the kinds of qualities that scripture consistently associates with love, faithfulness, and spiritual maturity.
What Unhealthy Relationships Produce
Looking at fruit works both ways. If positive outcomes can help reveal the health of a relationship, negative outcomes can also provide important insight into whether something is causing harm. The principle is not simply about identifying what is good. It is also about recognising patterns that undermine wellbeing, dignity, and flourishing.
Relationships marked by manipulation, control, dishonesty, or abuse often produce very different results. Fear can become normalised. Trust may gradually erode. Shame frequently increases. Instead of growing in confidence and security, people may find themselves becoming smaller, more isolated, and increasingly uncertain of their own worth. Anxiety can replace peace. Self protection can replace openness. What begins as connection can slowly become a source of distress.
These outcomes matter because they reveal something about the nature of the relationship itself. A healthy relationship is not defined by perfection, but it generally moves people towards greater trust, honesty, care, and mutual support. When the overall direction is consistently harmful, the fruit becomes difficult to ignore.
The same principle can also be applied beyond individual relationships. Teachings, traditions, and belief systems produce fruit as well. Ideas shape lives. Theologies influence communities. Messages communicated from pulpits, classrooms, and church structures often leave lasting effects on the people who receive them.
For this reason, many Christians believe it is appropriate to examine not only whether a teaching is sincerely held, but also what that teaching consistently produces. Does it encourage love, hope, compassion, and spiritual growth? Does it draw people towards God and deeper relationship with others? Or does it leave people trapped in fear, shame, self hatred, or despair?
Asking these questions does not mean that truth should be judged solely by emotional responses. Some teachings are challenging and may involve difficult self examination. Even so, the New Testament repeatedly points towards the life giving work of God’s Spirit. Where God’s Spirit is active, qualities such as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, faithfulness, and hope are expected to grow.
When a message consistently produces hopelessness, self rejection, or a sense of being beyond God’s love, many Christians believe it is reasonable to ask difficult questions about whether that message fully reflects the character of God revealed in Christ. Paying attention to fruit is not a rejection of faith. It is one of the ways scripture itself encourages believers to discern what is leading towards life and what may be leading away from it.
Why Fruit Matters More Than Appearances
Religious communities sometimes place enormous emphasis on labels. Certain relationships are readily approved. Others are viewed with suspicion. Some people find acceptance more easily than others based on assumptions about who they are or how their lives fit within established expectations.
The difficulty is that appearances can be deceptive. Throughout the Gospels, Jesus repeatedly challenges the tendency to make judgements based solely on external factors. Again and again, he looks beyond categories, reputations, and social assumptions to examine what is taking place beneath the surface.
People who appeared righteous were sometimes revealed to be lacking compassion. Individuals dismissed as outsiders occasionally displayed remarkable faith. Religious status did not automatically indicate spiritual health, and social disapproval did not necessarily indicate spiritual failure. The reality was often more complex than the labels suggested.
This is one reason the biblical emphasis on fruit remains so important. A healthy tree does not become unhealthy because someone misidentifies it. Nor does an unhealthy tree become healthy because it carries an approved label. The fruit provides evidence of what is actually present.
The same principle can be applied to relationships. Assumptions about the people involved may influence how a relationship is perceived, but assumptions alone cannot reveal its true character. What deserves attention is the reality being lived out within that relationship. Is trust growing? Is faithfulness evident? Are kindness, patience, sacrifice, and mutual care becoming visible? Are the people involved becoming more compassionate, responsible, and loving?
These questions move the conversation beyond appearances and towards substance. Rather than relying entirely on categories, they encourage Christians to consider what a relationship is producing over time and whether it reflects the qualities that scripture consistently celebrates.
For many believers, this approach echoes the example of Jesus himself. His ministry repeatedly directs attention away from superficial judgements and towards the deeper realities of the human heart. The focus shifts from labels to character, from assumptions to evidence, and from external appearances to the fruit that becomes visible in people’s lives. When evaluating relationships, teachings, or communities, that fruit deserves careful and honest consideration.
What This Means for LGBTIQ Christians
Many LGBTIQ Christians have been told that their relationships cannot possibly reflect God’s blessing or approval. For some, this message has been repeated so often that it becomes difficult to imagine any alternative perspective. Yet lived experience has led many believers to ask whether the reality is more complex than they were once taught.
Some same sex relationships are characterised by remarkable faithfulness over many years. Others demonstrate sacrificial love through periods of illness, hardship, or uncertainty. Emotional support, mutual care, forgiveness, commitment, and spiritual encouragement are often woven into the daily lives of couples seeking to build a life together. In many cases, these relationships have also become places where people grow in compassion, responsibility, patience, and service to others.
Experiences such as these naturally raise important questions. If the fruit of the Spirit is visible, how should Christians understand that reality? If a relationship appears to encourage love, faithfulness, kindness, generosity, and spiritual growth, what significance should those outcomes carry within theological reflection?
For many affirming Christians, these questions have become an important part of discernment. Rather than beginning with assumptions about what a relationship must be, they believe it is important to look carefully at what is actually taking place within it. Attention is directed towards the character being formed, the commitments being honoured, and the impact the relationship has on the people involved.
This approach draws upon a principle found throughout the New Testament. Fruit matters. The qualities that emerge over time provide insight into the health of a relationship and the direction in which it is leading people. A relationship that consistently nurtures faithfulness, compassion, integrity, and care for others presents a different picture from one characterised by selfishness, dishonesty, or harm.
Many affirming believers therefore see fruit as an important element of Christian discernment. They do not regard it as the only consideration, nor do they believe experience should replace scripture. Instead, they see lived experience, biblical reflection, and spiritual fruit as part of a broader conversation about how God’s presence and activity can be recognised in people’s lives.
For those who hold this perspective, the question is not simply whether a relationship fits an expected category. The deeper question is whether it reflects the qualities that scripture consistently associates with God’s work in the world. Looking at the fruit helps move the conversation beyond assumptions and towards a more careful examination of what is actually being produced in the lives of individuals, couples, and communities.
The Difference Between Conviction & Shame
Christian growth sometimes involves challenge. The process of spiritual transformation is not always comfortable, and scripture contains many examples of people being confronted, corrected, and called towards deeper faithfulness. Honest self examination can reveal areas where change is needed, and genuine conviction can become a catalyst for growth.
Conviction, however, serves a very different purpose from shame. Conviction draws attention to attitudes, behaviours, or patterns that need to be addressed while still affirming a person’s value and dignity. It creates the possibility of change because it is rooted in the belief that growth, healing, and restoration are possible.
Shame operates differently. Rather than focusing on what a person does, it often attacks who a person believes themselves to be. Instead of encouraging transformation, it can create a sense of worthlessness, rejection, or hopelessness. Where conviction invites people towards greater honesty and freedom, shame frequently leaves them trapped in fear, self condemnation, and despair.
This distinction matters because the New Testament consistently portrays God’s work as life giving. Growth may involve difficult conversations, painful truths, or significant changes, but the direction remains towards healing rather than destruction, restoration rather than rejection, and hope rather than despair.
The fruit of the Spirit reflects this reality. Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control are qualities that contribute to wholeness and flourishing. They help people become more fully alive, more capable of healthy relationships, and more deeply connected to God and others.
For many Christians, this provides an important lens for discernment. A message that encourages honesty, responsibility, repentance, and growth may be challenging, yet it ultimately points towards greater freedom and life. A message that consistently produces self hatred, hopelessness, chronic fear, or a belief that a person is beyond God’s love raises different questions.
While spiritual growth is rarely effortless, the overall movement of God’s work is towards wholeness. Again and again, the biblical story points towards restoration, reconciliation, healing, and renewed relationship. Challenge may be part of that journey, but hopelessness is not its destination. The work of God’s Spirit consistently moves people towards life, even when the path involves difficult growth along the way.
What Jesus Looked For
Throughout the Gospels, Jesus repeatedly focuses on what emerges from a person’s life. His concern is not limited to outward compliance or the appearance of righteousness. Instead, he consistently directs attention towards the qualities that reveal the condition of the heart and the way those qualities shape relationships with others.
Compassion matters because it reflects a willingness to recognise and respond to human need. Mercy matters because it creates space for grace, forgiveness, and restoration. Faithfulness matters because it demonstrates integrity, commitment, and reliability. Love matters because it sits at the centre of Jesus’ teaching and shapes every other aspect of Christian life.
Again and again, Jesus challenges approaches to religion that prioritise appearances while neglecting deeper realities. He warns against focusing on external presentation while ignoring justice, mercy, and faithfulness. The issue is not whether rules exist, but whether those rules serve the purposes for which they were given. Character consistently takes precedence over performance.
Throughout his ministry, attention returns to the impact a person’s life has on others. Are people being treated with dignity? Are relationships characterised by love and integrity? Are mercy and compassion present? Is a person’s faith producing good fruit in the world around them? These are the kinds of questions that repeatedly emerge in the Gospels.
This emphasis provides an important principle for contemporary conversations about relationships. Rather than focusing solely on labels, categories, or assumptions, many Christians believe it is valuable to consider the qualities that are actually being cultivated within a relationship. Does it encourage faithfulness, kindness, patience, generosity, and mutual care? Does it help people become more loving, responsible, and compassionate? Does it contribute to the wellbeing of those involved and the communities around them?
The example of Jesus suggests that these questions matter. Throughout the Gospels, the focus repeatedly shifts from appearances to substance, from external classifications to the fruit that becomes visible over time. Character, relationships, and the impact people have on one another remain central concerns.
For that reason, many Christians see this principle as a helpful guide when navigating difficult conversations about relationships. Looking carefully at what emerges from a person’s life can provide insight that assumptions alone cannot. In the teaching of Jesus, the quality of the fruit remains one of the most important indicators of spiritual health and faithfulness.
Scripture
The Fruit of the Spirit
Galatians 5:22–23
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.”
Paul describes the qualities that naturally emerge where God’s Spirit is at work.
A Tree Is Known by Its Fruit
Matthew 7:16
“By their fruit you will recognise them.”
Jesus teaches that outcomes reveal something important about the source from which they come.
Love Does No Harm
Romans 13:10
“Love does no harm to a neighbour. Therefore love is the fulfilment of the law.”
Love remains one of the clearest measures of spiritual health.
Remain in My Love
John 15:5
“I am the vine; you are the branches…”
Spiritual fruit grows through connection with Christ rather than through fear or coercion.
Perfect Love Drives Out Fear
1 John 4:18
“There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear…”
Love and fear move in different directions. The presence of one often diminishes the other.
Christ Came to Bring Life
John 10:10
“I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.”
The ministry of Jesus is consistently oriented towards flourishing, restoration, and abundant life.
In Summary
The fruit of the Spirit offers Christians a powerful way to think about relationships. Rather than beginning with labels, assumptions, or categories, scripture repeatedly invites believers to pay attention to what grows over time. The focus is not simply on what people claim, but on what becomes visible through the way they live, love, and relate to one another.
In Galatians, Paul describes the fruit of the Spirit as love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self control. These qualities are not presented as abstract ideals. They are signs of spiritual health and evidence of a life being shaped by God’s presence.
Where God’s Spirit is at work, love tends to deepen. Joy becomes more visible even in difficult circumstances. Peace becomes more possible in the midst of conflict and uncertainty. Patience grows through challenge. Kindness shapes everyday interactions. Faithfulness strengthens commitment. Gentleness protects dignity. Over time, these qualities influence the way people treat one another and the kind of relationships they build.
For many Christians, this provides an important framework for discernment. Rather than evaluating relationships solely through categories or assumptions, they ask what those relationships are producing. Are the people involved becoming more compassionate, more faithful, more generous, and more loving? Is the relationship encouraging honesty, responsibility, care, and spiritual growth? Does it contribute to flourishing rather than harm?
A relationship that consistently nurtures love, faithfulness, integrity, mutual support, and personal growth bears a strong resemblance to the qualities Paul celebrates in Galatians. While no relationship is perfect, the overall direction matters. Fruit becomes visible through patterns that emerge over months and years rather than isolated moments.
The same principle can also be applied to teachings, traditions, and belief systems. Messages that foster hope, compassion, responsibility, and deeper relationship with God may reflect the life giving work of the Spirit. By contrast, teachings that consistently leave people trapped in shame, fear, isolation, self rejection, or despair deserve careful examination in light of the Gospel’s broader message.
Jesus taught that trees are known by their fruit. This simple image remains one of the most practical tools for spiritual discernment found in scripture. It encourages believers to look beyond appearances and consider what is actually being produced. The question is not only what a relationship is called, but what it creates. Not only what a teaching claims, but what it does.
For that reason, many Christians believe fruit matters deeply. The qualities that emerge from a relationship, a community, or a belief system can reveal whether it is moving people towards greater love, faithfulness, compassion, and wholeness. In the end, asking what something produces may be one of the most important ways Christians discern whether it reflects the purposes and character of God.

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